How to Ask Someone's Age in Korean: 9 Ways, and Who Each One Is Safe With
How to ask someone's age in Korean is not one phrase, it is a choice between about nine of them, and the wrong pick is the thing that makes you look rude. The reason beginners get this wrong is almost never the vocabulary — 몇 살 (myeot sal) is day-one material — it is that they attach it to the wrong ending, or point it at the wrong person.
And you will need to ask. Korean makes you decide, usually within the first two minutes of meeting someone, whether you are going to speak 존댓말 (jondaenmal) or 반말 (banmal) to them, and whether you call them 형, 오빠, 누나, 언니 or 씨. You cannot make that decision without knowing roughly how old they are.
So asking is normal between new adult acquaintances. What is not normal is asking the way a textbook taught you.
| Situation | Asking someone's age |
|---|---|
| How much politeness matters | High — the phrase changes with the age gap, and one of the common forms is a fight opener |
| Safe default | 나이가 어떻게 되세요? (naiga eotteoke doeseyo?) |
If You Only Remember One
Use 나이가 어떻게 되세요? (naiga eotteoke doeseyo?) — literally "how does your age come to be?"
This is safe with any adult: a stranger, a new colleague, your partner's older cousin, a shop owner. It is polite without being stiff, and it does not assume anything about how old they look.
Two exceptions. If the person is clearly elderly, swap 나이 for 연세 (yeonse). If they are a child, drop the honorific and say 몇 살이야? (myeot sal-iya?).
The Expressions, and Who Each One Is For
Jump to a phrase
- 나이가 어떻게 되세요? — naiga eotteoke doeseyo? (literally: how does your age come to be?)
- 실례지만, 나이를 여쭤봐도 될까요? — sillyejiman, naireul yeojjwobwado doelkkayo? (literally: it's rude of me, but may I ask your age?)
- 몇 년생이세요? — myeon nyeonsaeng-iseyo? (literally: which birth-year person are you?)
- 몇 살이세요? — myeot sal-iseyo? (literally: how many years old are you?)
- 연세가 어떻게 되세요? — yeonsega eotteoke doeseyo? (literally: how does your honourable age come to be?)
- 무슨 띠세요? — museun ttiseyo? (literally: which zodiac animal are you?)
- 학번이 어떻게 되세요? — hakbeoni eotteoke doeseyo? (literally: what is your student number?)
- 몇 살이에요? — myeot sal-ieyo? (literally: how many years old are you?)
- 몇 살이야? — myeot sal-iya? (literally: how old are you?)
1. 나이가 어떻게 되세요?
naiga eotteoke doeseyo? (literally: how does your age come to be?)
The default. It is polite, soft, and it is what adults actually say to each other on first meeting. The reason it feels gentler than a direct "how old are you" is that it asks about 나이 (nai, age) as a fact rather than pointing the question at the person.
Say this to a stranger, a new coworker, a classmate you just met, your friend's parent, anyone adult whose age you don't know. If the setting is genuinely formal — an interview, a client, a stage — the 합니다체 version is 나이가 어떻게 되십니까? (naiga eotteoke doesimnikka?).
⚠️ Watch out — There is no trap here, and that is why it is the one to memorise. The only miss is using it on someone in their seventies, where 연세 is expected, or on a six-year-old, where the honorific -세요 sounds like you are teasing them.
2. 실례지만, 나이를 여쭤봐도 될까요?
sillyejiman, naireul yeojjwobwado doelkkayo? (literally: it's rude of me, but may I ask your age?)
The full-cushion version. 여쭤보다 (yeojjwoboda) is the humble form of 물어보다 — you lower yourself rather than raising them, which is a different mechanism from -시-, and it is why this lands as the most deferential option on the list.
Say this when you need the information but have no social right to it yet: a customer, a patient, someone senior to you at work, your partner's parents on day one. It buys you permission before you take the answer.
⚠️ Watch out — Among friends or with someone obviously younger, this is so formal it reads as sarcasm. Don't aim it at a 20-year-old barista.
3. 몇 년생이세요?
myeon nyeonsaeng-iseyo? (literally: which birth-year person are you?)
"What year were you born?" This is the one adult Koreans use most on each other, because it sidesteps the number entirely and gives you the thing you actually want: the gap. People answer with the last two digits — 97년생이에요 (97-nyeonsaeng-ieyo), "I'm a '97".
Say this to peers, new colleagues, people in a hobby group, anyone within rough shouting distance of your own age. It is also the polite escape hatch when asking a number outright feels too blunt.
⚠️ Watch out — It flattens the age difference by design, so it is the wrong tool for someone much older than you — asking a 70-year-old their birth year sounds like you are filling in a form. Use 연세가 어떻게 되세요 there.
4. 몇 살이세요?
myeot sal-iseyo? (literally: how many years old are you?)
Grammatically polite — the -세요 carries the honorific -시- — but tonally direct. It asks for a bare number, which is why it feels more like a question on a form than 나이가 어떻게 되세요.
Say this to someone the same age or younger whom you are still using 존댓말 with: a younger coworker, a student, a shop assistant, the person next to you at a class. Perfectly acceptable, just plainer.
⚠️ Watch out — To someone clearly older than you it is a half-step too blunt. Not offensive, but it marks you as a learner using the phrase you learned first.
5. 연세가 어떻게 되세요?
yeonsega eotteoke doeseyo? (literally: how does your honourable age come to be?)
연세 (yeonse) is the honorific noun for age — the same substitution logic as 이름 → 성함 and 집 → 댁. It is the expected form for the elderly, and leaving it out when it is called for is a real misstep, not a nuance.
Say this to someone clearly in their late sixties or above: a grandparent, an elderly neighbour, a village elder, a patient. Say it with 실례지만 in front and you cannot go wrong.
⚠️ Watch out — This is the trap on this list. Using 연세 on someone in their thirties, forties or fifties tells them they look old, and they will hear it that way. Where the line sits varies by person — if you are guessing, use 나이가 어떻게 되세요 instead.
6. 무슨 띠세요?
museun ttiseyo? (literally: which zodiac animal are you?)
The sideways route. 띠 (tti) is the twelve-year zodiac animal of your birth year, and since the cycle repeats every twelve years, knowing the 띠 plus a rough look at the person usually pins the year exactly. The answer comes back as 저 토끼띠예요 (jeo tokkitti-yeyo), "I'm a rabbit".
Say this to peers and to older people alike — it is friendly rather than nosy, and it is a comfortable way in when a straight number feels intrusive. It is common small talk across all ages.
⚠️ Watch out — It only works if you know the cycle, otherwise the answer is useless to you. And if you are twelve years off in your guess, you will place someone in completely the wrong generation — if you cannot do the arithmetic on the spot, ask 몇 년생이세요 instead.
7. 학번이 어떻게 되세요?
hakbeoni eotteoke doeseyo? (literally: what is your student number?)
학번 (hakbeon) is the year you entered university — 11학번 means 2011. Among Korean university students and graduates in their twenties and thirties this does the same job as 몇 년생, and it often decides seniority in student circles more than birth year does.
Say this to current students, recent graduates, people you met through a university network.
⚠️ Watch out — Useless, and slightly awkward, with anyone who did not go to a Korean university — including you, probably. It also quietly assumes the person has a degree, which is why it stays inside campus-adjacent circles.
8. 몇 살이에요?
myeot sal-ieyo? (literally: how many years old are you?)
Same question as 몇 살이세요 with the honorific -시- removed. Still 존댓말, so it is not casual — it just stops elevating the listener. That one syllable is the whole difference.
Say this to a child, a teenager, or someone clearly younger than you whom you still don't know well. Parents use it on other people's kids constantly.
⚠️ Watch out — Do not use it on anyone older than you or anyone you have just met as an equal. They will notice the missing -시-, and the read is that you have placed yourself above them.
9. 몇 살이야?
myeot sal-iya? (literally: how old are you?)
Full 반말 (banmal). This is for a child, a close friend who has already agreed to drop formalities, or someone much younger in a relaxed setting. From an adult to a five-year-old it is the only natural option — the honorific versions would sound mocking.
Use it once the relationship is settled, never to open one.
⚠️ Watch out — 너 몇 살이야? (neo myeot sal-iya?) with 너 attached is, between adult strangers, how a confrontation starts. It is the line people shout before a fight. Never aim it at an adult you don't know, no matter how friendly your tone.
## How It Sounds in Real Life
Language exchange meetup, two adults, first time meeting, both using 존댓말.
A: 혹시 몇 년생이세요? (hoksi myeon nyeonsaeng-iseyo?) - Can I ask what year you were born?
B: 저 97년생이에요. (jeo 97-nyeonsaeng-ieyo.) - I'm a '97.
A: 아, 제가 한 살 위네요. (a, jega han sal wineyo.) - Ah, I'm a year older then.
Apartment entrance, speaking to an elderly neighbour you greet most mornings.
You: 실례지만 연세가 어떻게 되세요? (sillyejiman yeonsega eotteoke doeseyo?) - Excuse me, may I ask how old you are?
Neighbour: 올해 일흔둘이야. (olhae ilheundul-iya.) - Seventy-two this year.
(She answers in 반말 because she is decades older — that is expected downward, and you still answer up in 존댓말.)
Playground, talking to a small child.
You: 몇 살이야? (myeot sal-iya?) - How old are you?
Child: 다섯 살이요. (daseot sal-iyo.) - Five.
(몇 살이세요 here would sound like you were making fun of her.)
Office, two new colleagues at the same rank, sorting out who is older.
A: 민수 씨, 혹시 몇 년생이세요? (Minsu ssi, hoksi myeon nyeonsaeng-iseyo?) - Minsu, what year were you born?
B: 89년생이요. 지현 씨는요? (89-nyeonsaeng-iyo. Jihyeon ssi-neunyo?) - '89. And you?
A: 저도 89예요. 동갑이네요. (jeodo 89-yeyo. donggap-ineyo.) - Me too. We're the same age.
Casual chat, checking which age count someone meant.
A: 저 스물다섯이에요. (jeo seumuldaseot-ieyo.) - I'm twenty-five.
B: 만으로요? (man-euroyo?) - International age?
A: 아니요, 한국 나이로요. 만으로는 스물넷이요. (aniyo, hanguk nairoyo. man-euroneun seumulnet-iyo.) - No, Korean age. Twenty-four by international count.
Which One Do I Pick?
- Default to 나이가 어떻게 되세요? whenever you are unsure. It is the only phrase on this list that is wrong almost nowhere.
- Clearly elderly — late sixties and up — switch 나이 to 연세. If you are hesitating about whether they qualify, they don't; use 나이.
- Roughly your own age and you want to avoid sounding nosy: ask 몇 년생이세요? You get the gap without either of you saying a number out loud.
- Clearly younger than you, still a stranger: 몇 살이에요? Actual child: 몇 살이야?
- High-stakes or formal setting — client, interview, your partner's parents, anyone whose goodwill you need: front it with 실례지만 and use 여쭤봐도 될까요?
- At work, check rank before age. If the person has a title — 과장님, 대리님, 선생님 — the title decides how you speak to them, and age is secondary small talk.
Mistakes That Give You Away
- Don't translate "how old are you" word for word. 당신 몇 살이에요? (dangsin myeot sal-ieyo?) uses a pronoun Koreans mostly reserve for arguments and song lyrics. Drop the pronoun entirely: 몇 살이에요?
- Don't use 너 몇 살이야? on an adult stranger because a drama taught it to you. In that drama it was the start of a fight. Use 나이가 어떻게 되세요?
- Don't use 연세 to flatter someone middle-aged into feeling respected. It reads as "you look elderly". 나이가 어떻게 되세요 is the respectful choice for anyone under about sixty-five.
- Don't attach -세요 to a child: 몇 살이세요? to a six-year-old sounds like a joke at their expense. 몇 살이야? is the normal, kind version.
- Don't open a business introduction with the age question. Exchange 명함 (myeongham, business cards) and titles first — in many Korean workplaces rank overrides age, and leading with age looks like you are trying to establish dominance.
- Don't assume the number you hear is international age. If it matters, ask 만으로 몇 살이세요? (man-euro myeot sal-iseyo?)
What Learners Get Wrong
"Korean age is always one or two years higher, so I just subtract to get the real number."
Since June 2023 Korean law standardised on 만 나이 (man nai), international age, for official and legal purposes. Everyday speech did not switch overnight. Younger speakers increasingly give their 만 나이; many older speakers and most casual conversation still use 세는 나이, which is one or two years higher depending on whether your birthday has passed. Usage genuinely varies by age group and by context, so if precision matters, ask 만으로 몇 살이세요?
"Asking someone's age is rude, so I should avoid it the way I would at home."
Between new adult acquaintances it is routine, because the answer determines the verb endings and the address terms you will use for the rest of the conversation. It is not uniformly comfortable, though — in formal business settings rank does that job instead, and plenty of people prefer to be asked 몇 년생이세요 rather than for a number. Reading the setting matters more than a blanket rule.
"If I just use 존댓말 with everyone, I never need to know anyone's age."
존댓말 covers you for verb endings, but not for what you call people. 형, 오빠, 누나, 언니 all depend on the other person being older than you, and so does the question of who gets to propose dropping formalities later. You can stall on the age question; you cannot avoid it forever.
"몇 살 is the only word for age I need."
Korean has a separate honorific noun, 연세, for the age of an elderly person, and a humble verb, 여쭤보다, for the act of asking. These are noun- and verb-level honorifics that sit outside the -세요 ending, which is why 몇 살이세요 and 연세가 어떻게 되세요 are not interchangeable even though both are polite.
Why Korean Has So Many Ways to Ask This
In English, politeness lives in tone of voice and padding — "sorry, do you mind if I ask how old you are?" The words barely change. Korean puts it in the grammar instead, which means you have to commit before you open your mouth.
Three separate dials are turning in these nine phrases. The first is the speech level, the sentence ending: 합니다체 (-ㅂ니까) for formal, 해요체 (-요) for ordinary polite, 반말 (no -요) for close or downward. The second is the honorific -시-, an infix that elevates the person you are talking about — it is the difference between 몇 살이에요 and 몇 살이세요, and between 되요 and 되세요. The third is lexical substitution: Korean keeps whole alternate words for honorific and humble use, which is where 나이 → 연세, 이름 → 성함, 집 → 댁 and 물어보다 → 여쭤보다 come from.
Once you see the three dials, you can predict phrasings this post never listed. Need to ask an elderly person's name? Apply the same two moves you applied to 연세 — swap the noun, add -시-, keep 해요체 — and you get 성함이 어떻게 되세요? (seonghami eotteoke doeseyo?). Need to ask whether someone has eaten, respectfully? 진지 드셨어요? (jinji deusyeosseoyo?). The pattern is the same every time: pick the noun, pick the ending, decide whether the subject deserves -시-. That is the whole system, and the age question is just the first place it bites.
Related Guides
What You Will Need Next
- how to say your own age in Korean
- when can you use banmal with someone in Korean
- how to call someone older than you in Korean (oppa, hyeong, nuna, eonni)
One phrase covers almost every case: 나이가 어떻게 되세요? Swap 나이 for 연세 if the person is clearly elderly, drop to 몇 살이야? if you are talking to a child, and reach for 몇 년생이세요? when a bare number would feel too direct. The only genuinely dangerous version is 너 몇 살이야? — keep that one out of your mouth.
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